color my life with the chaos of trouble

are my favorite thing about the spark of beginning to like someone - you know, when you look up and theyre looking at you too, and your eyes meet, then you look away but it happens again and you know. you just know,  ”this could be something”…

tonight i’m just gonna cry because sometimes people just suck and this town sucks and emotions well emotions really suck at certain times you know like when you feel like the weight of the world is gonna crush you like a dropped tortilla chip under your foot.and then there’s the thud in the bottom of your stomach that you feel cause you don’t want to go to sleep,because then you’ll have to wake up and deal with people; and while saying that makes you sound like a loner,it’s really not about that at all,it’s just the heartwrenching feeling in the back of your brain that none of these people really get you,none of them really KNOW you,and none of them actually give a shit enough to try because theyre all wrapped up in their own little game of oh-this-town-sucks-lets-get-bored-and-fuck-someone-we-havent-fucked-yet-then-gossip-about-it-for-a-week.but all that shit you just have to deal with,on top of your own miserable problems,like the boy who wont look at you anymore,the chemistry teat you dont know shit about,the bills your dad hides under the couch cushion.im not saying in depressed,because tomorrow ill wake up and itll be a new day and ill be in a new mood.but for now: fuck feeling like this.